Kayn reviews the movie based on the Final Fantasy video game series. Wow! It's another crossover! Where are my pants?!

Gawkman and I (both of us being the only vidio game nerds in our group of friends) went out to see Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within the yesterday with hopes of a first video game based movie that would actually be good.

Where are Cecil and Kain?

You see, this has always been a problem - movies based on video games usually end up sucking the mildew off the back of Roseanne's ass. Here's a small list of videogame movies that wend down the death tube:

  • Super Mario Brother: Not that bad, but the whole cheese factor goes skyward towards the end.
  • Street Fighter: Cheesy, cheesy, cheesy. Especially the end.
  • Tomb Raider: Read to see...
  • Mortal Kombat: The first one wasn't that bad, but the sequel was gimp-infested.

There are more, but I'm to lazy to think of them.

So we get into the theater (which is surprisingly packed), and wait for the lights to dim. Most people we see are guys that are nerdy looking and with computer tans. I asked Gawkman, in my nerdy fashion, "GEE, I wonder how many people here actually played the games?" With that he replied, "I dunno."

After the lights fade and the movie trailers are all done and overwith, the movie starts. My first impression was pure awe - the CG and animation are astounding. So detailed, in fact, that you see every strand of hair off of the main characters. You also see skin pores, birthmarks, moles, and scars. Everything is so detailed, they look almost real. Something about them appears to still have that fake effect. Certain parts of their face appears wood-like with a small CG gloss that reminds you about everything being completely rendered. 60 million dollars spent on this movie, and it really shows.

Voice acting was mediocre. Alec Baldwin, Donald Sutherland, and other well known actors contrubuted their voice talents to the characters in this movie, however I don't know if they were serious about their scripts. Certain instances in the movie would leave you scratching your head with confusion on whether the character really cared if their friend was dying. The dialogue needed some help and some more passion. Not that much more, but enough to make it really shine.

The storyline was really good. Which isn't much of a surprise; I haven't played a single Final Fantasy game with a crappy storyline, and it t'would appear that they didn't let a bunch of crap out of the door. I won't spoil anything, but there are relations to the Final Fantasy endings with the movie ending that will, uh, not surprise those who've played the games and were let down at the end. I won't say anymore about that... (vomit)

Do the boogers look real?

If you like a good sci-fi flick, with some fancy effects, go watch this movie. If you are a typical chick who hates sci-fi movies but you have nice boobs (and will keep your mouth shut), go see the movie with me. If you like to whine about everything, go see this movie with Gawkman. If you're ugly, go by yourself (and wear something over your head - for the love of God).

Ooops...

Rating

Category Comment Rating
Originality A pretty cool original Sci-fi flick, y'know. 4
Acting I suppose having veteran actors means the voice acting is automatically good? Pshaw. 3
Soundtrack Nothing grabbed me really... 3.5
Effects/Presentation STUNNING. I was floored by the CG and effects. 5
Storyline Cool story...'till the end. 4
0
Final Verdict: 3.9

Comments!

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The following comments after this point are old comments. Yay!

Ravenwolf plutoniums:

Smilie!Wow. Most people I talk to hate this movie. I'm glad I'm not alone in liking it.
It's TEH PORTRAGONISST!11
Some Guy?
Bad, bad Kefk...uh...
Chick!
Dr. Cid. Cid? CID