I’m in love with a girl from Uttoxeter, An exquisite and passionate cock-sitter; With her prehensile hole, She envelopes my pole, And then squirms up and down as my rocks hit her.

I wonder how many cocks these guys saw before she showed up.
We’ve all met these chicks.
Because in Thailand you never know.
This is how commercials should all be made.
Baby is enthralled by snot.
How kids learn to wheelie.
Further humiliation in school. Hooray.
This kid got what he had coming.
Clean glass makes for lots of laughs.
Damn, I wish somebody missed me that much.
When a men enters a kitchen, interesting shit happens.
Do the daft.
If Santa, Hulk Hogan, and Donald Trump had a 60 year old hispanic baby….
18 old school photos you won’t believe aren’t photoshopped.
You’re not a real man until you’ve bitch slapped a bear.
Timing win.
Owned.
What a ladykiller.
Nice move nutjob.
For a man who doesn’t want to die he doesn’t do much to relax.
Public transportation winning again.
THose damn rascal scooters will go ANYWHERE.
Sugar game.
Not giving a fuck.
Wheelie fail.
Technology fail.
Fucking lies.
Queen.
She won’t be fooled.
I can read it.
Call me dad I guess.
You’re not doing it right, let me show you.
Get our snow fails while we can.
6 real world jedi mind tricks salesmen are using on you.
Panel of caged average americans weigh in on economy.
Our friend David Thorne is back again.
Nostalgia Critic: Secret of nimh 2. This farmer has about 200 hens, but no rooster and he wants chicks. So, he goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster. The other farmer says, “Yeah, I’ve got this great rooster, named Randy; he’ll service every chicken you’ve got. No problem.” Well , Randy the rooster is a lot of money, but the farmer decides he’d be worth it. So , he buys Randy. The farmer takes Randy home and sets him down in the barnyard, giving the rooster a pep talk, ” Randy, I want you to pace yourself now. You’ve got a lot of chickens to service here and you cost me a lot of money and I’ll need you to do a good job. So, take your time and have some fun,” the farmer said with a chuckle. Randy seemed to understand, so the farmer points towards the hen house and Randy took off like a shot ~WHAM~ He nails every hen on there THREE or FOUR times and the farmer is just shocked. Randy runs out of the hen house and sees a flock of geese down by the lake ~WHAM~ He gets all the geese. Randy’s up in the pigpen. He’s in with the cows. Randy is jumping on every animal the farmer owns. The farmer is distraught, worried that his expensive rooster won’t even last the day. Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up the next day to find Randy dead as a doorknob in the middle of the yard. Buzzards are circling overhead. The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colorful animal , shakes his head and says, “Oh, Randy, I told you to pace yourself. I tried to get you to slow down, now look what you’ve done to yourself.” Randy opens one eye, nods towards the sky and say’s , “Shhh. They’re getting closer….”