The Daily Dumb 5-15-2013

Low side, bye bye.

Let’s lower it until it’s unusable.

Imma let you finish, but not the best vid I’ve ever seen of someone walking into a sign post.

Russian hockey kids have their own royal rumble.

Dude, wake up.

Flying into a dust storm.

Nice catch.

Drunk on her last day.

Awesome way to do a cover.

Grillmaster!

I like the part where she headbangs.

Nice Cage in a horror movie.

Cat’s having a bad day.

Thanks fagbook.

The 12 most terrifying things ever invented for babies.

It works on animals too.

McFuckthis.

Scaredy cat.

Home defense cat.

DAD FTW

Schizo parakeet.

The horror!

This is water.

22 meals gone wrong.

Creepy ice.

Outsourcing.

Sasha Grey.

Physics takes a field trip, and this shit happens.

Good kitty.

Rights?

Super slow mo lightning.

This is a thing?

Animals being jerks.

Message on a truck.

Born with Sids.

5 well known tips for eating healthy that don’t work.

Classic Bender.

Armageddon.

Photoshopping some fucking romance.

Start young.

We should all take shifts at the mall exterminating these fags.

Yes, yes I do.

Yo mama.

Where in the fuck is Cheetarah?

That’s the damn truth.

B&B

Artistic janitor.

Seriously.

A dirty old man pulls up in his car beside a little boy.

Holding a bag full of sweets, he says, “Hey kid, if I give you a piece of candy, will you come in my car?”

The little boy replies, “Hell mister, give me the whole bag and I’ll come in your mouth!”

The Daily Dumb 5-13-2013

Leno prank discovers great talent.

Ummmmmm, better make it a dozen in my case… *cough*

I would swear this was a screen shot of top gear, but I’ve seen every episode.

Happy Mother’s Day from Ripley Scott.

Good on this kid for sneaking that in.

Pure brilliance.

Mom’s a shitty dancer.

It’s nap time nigga.

Opening beers around the world.

Feline protest.

Dumbasses.

Is he Blian Clanston there?

Start watching at 2:20

Faces of meth.

Balancing ninja.

Nice try bitch.

Imagine seeing this shit happen.

A chick with bigger balls than you.

Lonely island has a new tune.

6 horrifying animal kills science didn’t think were possible.

Best kiss cam vid.

Invisible saw.

My inner teenager is pleased.

Perspective.

Hauling ass.

Pissed off that the dude bought an import.

The 2nd half of the video is missing, where he beats the ever loving shit out of the guy.

Ermine destroys cat in a play fight.

Australia is awesome.

Kids are hilarious.

WHY WON’T HE FUCKING EAT?!?!?!?

Vintage Hetfield.

A face full of fail.

More celebs read tweets about themselves.

Kids taste new foods in slow mo.

I used to do this on every rent check.

How every chick should do makeup.

Bro tales.

Dating.

St Elmos fire.

Chemistry.

Go Stewie!

Proper decor via Zoolander.

Cop was texting. Way to uphold the law fucker.

Civil war or hipster band?

Hipster god.

Excuse generator. This will be useful.

Yeah, seriously, shut the fuck up with all of that.

Awesome way of recycling.

Important work to be done by the head of state!

Really puts shit into perspective.

Asshole dog.

Meanwhile in a Chinese gift shop.

Barnes & Noble telling the truth.

You can’t please all the people all the time.

What the dog’s thinking when he shits on the carpet and walks away.

Camouflage.

Compliments to the chef.

Some people will do anything.

My OCD inner child is screaming at the top of his lungs.

Proper comedy.

THIS is the kind of shit you need to learn in sex ed. Fuck me. Junior high would’ve been so much easier.

Greatest resignation ever.

“My husband wants me to dress up in the bedroom as a nurse, ’cause that’s his fantasy — that we have health care.”

The Daily Dumb 5-10-2013

Ever wonder how your hard drive works?

Fuck her.

This kid is cool. To my 10th grade history teacher, watch this you fat old cunt.

Bitches love Eminem.

Early black metal.

Roommates can be great.

How does someone figure out that they can do this?

As empthatically as I can possible state… FUCK THIS

Strong motherfucker.

Bad time to throw like a girl.

Guilty.

Do it.

4chan total fucking win.

Think about it?

Two neighbors, 1 cup.

I’d vote for her.

Sad cat diaries.

Prague is the bomb.

Don’t like it? Get the fuck out.

CNN is fucking up.

Do the Darwin shake.

Crazy story behind this one.

My first computer… sniff sniff

Some days we have no idea how close we’ve come to the end.

Imagine if every pimple you ever had were combined into a super pimple!

I wish I liked coffee more. It would give my creativity more of a chance to flourish.

5 mind blowing true stories behind famous songs.

Donner Party FTW

Take that pedalfags.

Fuck the police.

Mousetrap.

Good times.

Buried the needle on my gaydar too.

Fucking idiots.

Incredible tumbling bastard.

Stress.

Bitches, take note.

Great way to take someone out.

I think I should get this.

Greatest kissing booth ever.

Boomerang.

The more you look the funnier it gets.

Impossible.

Legalize it yo.

Tim decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend. One evening, after the honeymoon, he was assembling some loads for an upcoming hunt.

His wife was standing there at the bench watching him. After a long period of silence she finally speaks.

Honey, I’ve been thinking, now that we are married I think it’s time you quit hunting, shooting, hand loading, and fishing. Maybe you should sell your guns and boat.

Tim gets this horrified look on his face.

She says, “Darling, what’s wrong?”

“There for a minute you were sounding like my ex-wife.”

“Ex wife!”, she screams, “I didn’t know you were married before!”

“I wasn’t. “

The Daily Dumb 5-8-2013

That’s how you do a motorcycle trip.

Woman rescued by a rib eating bastard.

Fuck Eminem. Meet M&M’s.

Your feet cold now?

Teachers handling their business.

Honest trailers: Star Trek.

Gimli’s bearded axe.

Damn, I hope she’ll be ok after that vicious attack.

He hang on long time.

Best of the lonely island songs.

5 famous people you won’t believe didn’t exist.

Gimme the damn stick already.

Do you like watching old gladiator movies?

Pets saving you time.

Praise be unto He.

I’d watch it.

What a dick.

Dibs.

Something awesome you can do with google street view.

Zach Galif;lkjafpoi on SNL.

Music is very useful.

Good guy Matt Kemp.

It’s a hard knock life girl, start getting used to it.

What a fucking moron.

The Megaphone man is here.

You might live in the ghetto if…

3d printed pistol.

What’s that thing called?

Gifs of people being awesome.

40 pounds of homemade explosives and one jeep.

The pyramid of the sun.

Flipping an overturned truck.

6 hidden glitches that make famous video games way better.

Protesting at the university.

Back to the drawing board.

Mom’s got the kids on ice.

Feel the burn.

Nurture dog.

Sir Mix-A-Lot’s lady.

Something you don’t see every day.

When life gives you dildos, you take that shit like a man.

…and the Grohl has spoken.

Awkward….

When a welder loses a bet and has to buy you a bottle of booze, it might show up looking like this.

True story.

Life of Pie.

Why y’all pullin me over?

Wanna play a game?

Make your job fun.

Alcohol and photoshop don’t mix.

Hipsters beware.

How I react when religious fags show up at my door.

Who needs a fountain?

Budgetpigs.

Lousy threat.

This is the guy that flamers gay bash openly in the street.

That’s a fucking shirt.

Sometimes you just have to dive in head first.

Reality.

Best face swap I’ve seen in a long time.

It’s cool that someone took the way I live and managed to sum it up in so few words.

Robomutt.

Blatant deception.

What’s brown and rhymes with snoop?

Dr. Dre

The Daily Dumb 5-6-2013

Stairwell illusion.

MERICA!

Unlikely pals.

Not everyone in Russia with a dashcam is a psychopath.

Awkward handshakes.

Nailed it.

The 5 stupidest ways important people leaked deadly secrets.

Junk food badass.

Drunk chicks…

There will be NONE of that.

New rules I wasn’t aware of.

I don’t speak Mexican!

What happens if you don’t sleep for 15 days?

Shitty explosion.

Telling physics to go fuck itself.

Nicely handled.

Solid Russian prank.

Shitty birthday.

5 insane theme parks you won’t believe were almost built.

Your professor does not approve.

Good on you Jim.

I want to see George Corpsegrinder wear one of these live.

Oh yes, definitely.

Goddamn nazis.

10 years ago….

Hooray for useless trivia.

They sure did, and where the fuck is he now?

Versatility.

Nice night on the town.

The only paste supported by the klan.

Before and after.

What it’s like being a biker.

A man in Washington DC is walking down the streets late in the night. He is surrounded by muggers and is asked to give all his money. The man says, “I am one of the members of Congress.” The muggers say, “Sorry boss!”

The Daily Dumb 5-3-2013

The metal community was dealt a severe blow with the loss of Slayer’s primary guitarist Jeff Hanneman yesterday. He was a guitar legend and hero to me, and a huge influence. Rot in hell Jeff, you’ll be missed. I hope there’s a big jam session with Jeff, Gar, Cliff, and Dio.

Who the fuck’s rights is this guy protecting?

Introduce this one to your mother.

Grocery shopping on a motorcycle.

WTF are you watching?

How in the hell did they manage that?

Meanwhile at the club….

What…. fuck…. stupid…. goddamn it.

Skillz0rz.

Badass costume.

Would wear.

I think I need this beast.

The world’s smallest movie is a trip.

Meanwhile in Texas.

I need to test this idea on my own mom. I bet it would be even funnier.

Fuck yeah, fight back.

Catwoman from the Ukraine.

Being in a relationship online.

Freak out.

Holy shit it’s a beard mullet.

How in the fuck?

Mozart is getting jazzy.

I want to see where she’s hiding the trumpet.

Shitty night out on the town.

Bad lip reading on the walking dead.

GTFO.

Tale of The Machine.

No texting.

Granny’s double backflip.

Ghetto.

Dustin ftw.

It’s not complicated.

Nice try.

Man, if I hadn’t just taken my truck in…. this guy’s local too!

Stompin’ on assholes.

6 mind blowing pop culture questions answered by super fans.

That’s what she said.

I’m not saying he’s fat but…..

Jealous fucker.

What show is this? Must see.

Solid answer.

Almost there.

Valid question Dave.

That Kunis girl knew what was up early.

Fuck job hunting, for this and many other reasons.

Video game physics in the real world.

Do you think that you don’t matter?

90 year old woman has never painted, has a stroke, and paints this.

Damn. Doing hard time.

Knock knock.

My girlfriend and I were having sex the other day when she looked at me and said, “Make love to me like in the movies.”
So I fucked her in the ass, pulled out, and came all over her face and hair.
I guess we don’t watch the same movies.

The Daily Dumb 5-1-2013

Another day at the pump.

An older album would have been a higher dose.

I wonder where he got 2600 dollars to begin with.

Feed it the little girl!

Save it, and then throw it down a hill.

Iron Man 2 honest trailer.

Roasted Ruskis.

The true handicap here was clearly mental.

Motivation.

Good mom raises good son.

Willie Nelson is 80. He celebrates by making audition tapes for the Hobbit 2.

Really funny condom ads.

UFC 159. Sonnen and Jones.

Jones breaking his toe. Goddamn this looks so painful.

UFC 159. Big Country vs Kongo.

The president doing some decent comedy.

Orchestra pranks.

Game of thrones facts.

Safety first.

You could write some killer riffs on this thing.

That was the cat telling him it was a forward slash.

I like how NONE of the safety stuff worked.

This is complete bullshit.

I would tip.

Survivors.

5 ridiculous health myths you probably believe.

5 true stories that will shatter your image of famous rock icons.

Did I do that?

Conan FTW

A real man will do anything for his kids. Would you talk shit to this guy? haha

Fuck the police.

The face of a cannibal/murderer.

Solid Venn diagram.

I hope someone can find this guy and post the picture on his wall. Endless shame commence.

Gruesome Koala accident.

Nailed it Stevie.

Fuck….

Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the dick by a rattlesnake. “I’ll go into town for a doctor,” the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the town’s only doctor, who is delivering a baby. “I can’t leave,” the doctor says. ‘But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground.” The guy ruins back to his friend, who is in agony. ‘What did the doctor say?” the victim asks. “He says you’re gonna die.”

The Daily Dumb 4-29-2013

British road rage is very very different.

She didn’t get the job based on her physics knowledge.

Calibration error.

Would vote.

I love it when I don’t see it coming.

Drunken master.

Hyundai with a touchy car ad I dig.

His friends call him twinkre toes.

Escaped lion prank.

Objects in mirror are closer than they appear.

People that need removal from the gene pool.

These get really good toward the end.

To catch a predator: Hood edition.

Humans with lizard powers? Yes.

Home depot master.

Hell of a typist.

3 people, 6 wheels, one engine, one crash.

Forgot how to cat.

Bowl builds itself.

Scariest roomba ever.

Collection of post it notes from a stay at home dad.

Cerebral Palsy kid is damn funny.

Scary ass robot.

Skating in India.

The 5 creepiest smear campaigns launched by powerful groups.

Too many pot brownies. Been there, done that.

Deal with it.

This and That.

I’m disabled as fuck.

Nice one douchebag.

Betty White and this chick should wrestle.

Contemptuous bitch.

HUGE fucking difference.

Get ready for a world of pain.

How we said no to drugs in the 90′s.

Every time.

Korean plastic surgery is getting out of control.

Holy fucking shit.

Bonding.

Paying your respects.

By Jupiter’s Cock, I’m getting old.

Not quite….

Awesome wallpaper.

Welcome to Australia.

I’ll take the girl in the 2nd pic any day.

Working there would be the shit.

I see your black Ahnold, and raise you black Matt Damon.

Reality bites.

Born genius.

Oh fuck, quick, eat it.

Owned and drove the same car for 82 years. Badass.

BOOM!

Old folks are such a treasure.

Dream big.

Had it coming.

SCIENCE!

Valid question.

Womenfolk.

Buddhism rules.

Fuck tyranny.

If it fits it sits, supersize edition.

…and in conclusion, goodbye from me and Argentina.

What do you get if you cross a dyslexic, an agnostic, and an insomniac?

Someone who lays awake at night wondering if there is a dog.

The Daily Dumb 4-26-2013

I’d let her kick my ass.

FUCK HOW DO I DO THIS

Tough workouts aren’t for pussies.

Filthy ballads.

WUTCHU MEAN RASSLIN AIN REEL?!?!?!

Ferris wheel badasses.

The fail never ends.

History in pictures.

1999. Where’s Opeth’s Still Life and Abyssos’ Fhinsthanian Nightbreed? Faggots.

You’ve got mail.

Fucking speeeeeeed.

Any dog people here?

Kids at this school should be proud to be there.

He was thoughtful.

Looking Good MJF.

Another fucking overdose. When will it end?

Winning the argument.

It saved their marriage.

I love second chances.

Road trips.

Evolution.

Brilliant bit.

Ying and yang.

Pro tip from Louie.

Volvo, I fucking love you.

Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?
A: So she can moan with the other

The Daily Dumb 4-24-2013

Extreme hammock.

Sit up machine.

The hazards of photography.

Unholy somersaulting satanic force.

Killer reflexes.

The biker’s code.

Minecraft sword IRL.

Should have finished kicking his ass.

First day and last day on the job.

Awesome writer at the local paper.

Ahhhnold goes for a drive.

Seriously….

Protect yourself.

Awesome scumbag steve.

Lying sacks of shit.

Will Ferrell outtakes are fucking hysterical.

Fucking hippies.

More bad luck.

Cold hearted bitch.

Road trip.

Damn good idea.

This brilliant bastard….

What a show that would have been.

Drugs are bad mmmk.

Inner species scat film on youtube.

Someone pulled the drain plug.

Fuck this shit.

The real story of fat Francis from youtube.

Predator is on the loose.

Trolling the pizza guy, and being a cool motherfucker at the same time.

anyád

Mom FTW

Mom again…

Child endangerment.

Brilliant card.

No doubt.

Oh man, I wish that would have been me.

The 5 worst error messages in the history of technology.

Poor Jane.

Think this guy would’ve been better than DeVito in Twins?

The Brits love their marathons.

Touching story about an African.

Pretzel cat confuses you with sleeping positions.

Post punk.

Tell that bitch Peter.

This is not bullshit.

A whole bunch of good ideas.

Play dead.

One of these is greater than the others.

Dude never gets a break.

Poor pinata.

Fuuuuuuuuuck fuck fuck fuck I need one.

OMFG look at that face.

White people.

Imagine.

I can get with this.

I can believe in this.

On Christmas morning, a cop on horseback was sitting at a traffic light. Next to him was a kid on his shiny new bike.

The cop said to the kid, “Nice bike you’ve got there. Did Santa bring that to you?”

The kid said, “Yeah.”

The cop said, “Well, next year tell Santa to put a taillight on that bike.” The cop then proceeded to issue the kid a $20 bicycle safety violation ticket.

The kid took the ticket, but before he rode off he said, “By the way, that’s a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?”

Humoring the kid, the cop said, “Yeah, he sure did.”

The kid said, “Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top.”